Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
