I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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