Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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