I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
