Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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