he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize