do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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