that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I have aggressive nipples.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
