Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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