Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
