It's Friday. Sex?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
