Texts From Last Night

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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I gave up sex with dolphins for you.

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  (815): I gave up sex with dolphins for you. http://tfl.nu/rt8h
  Replies (10) Good night (1243) Bad night (728)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER

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  (508): WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER http://tfl.nu/4rej
  Replies (12) Good night (651) Bad night (4349)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.

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  (715): I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed. http://tfl.nu/mebd
  Replies (21) Good night (4637) Bad night (776)
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  (716): View more from New York

  she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.

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  (716): she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless. http://tfl.nu/eill
  Replies (29) Good night (6437) Bad night (1118)
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  (530): View more from California

  I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me

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  (530): I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me http://tfl.nu/rrqt
  Replies (23) Good night (6591) Bad night (1100)
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  (661): View more from California

  So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?

  (818): View more from California

  I hate you.

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  (661): So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night? (818): I hate you. http://tfl.nu/ps95
  Replies (9) Good night (4998) Bad night (897)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome

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  (419): two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome http://tfl.nu/ey6z
  Replies (11) Good night (5007) Bad night (938)
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  (518): View more from New York

  our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.

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  (518): our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here. http://tfl.nu/908w
  Replies (5) Good night (3299) Bad night (753)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?

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  (586): Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed? http://tfl.nu/l7cc
  Replies (19) Good night (1806) Bad night (905)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way

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  (203): He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way http://tfl.nu/eve3
  Replies (9) Good night (2443) Bad night (970)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight

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  (603): Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight http://tfl.nu/77hx
  Replies (4) Good night (1303) Bad night (435)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.

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  (804): and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start. http://tfl.nu/94bc
  Replies (6) Good night (1198) Bad night (580)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"

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  (780): We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!" http://tfl.nu/le50
  Replies (5) Good night (2552) Bad night (376)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....

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  (250): So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too..... http://tfl.nu/p12c
  Replies (2) Good night (813) Bad night (435)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"

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  (306): no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out" http://tfl.nu/r386
  Replies (2) Good night (234) Bad night (331)

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