I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest