youre lurking in front of me
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.