oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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