I wannas sexs uuuuu
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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