woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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