i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
