i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
