Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
