Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
