is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Even my vagina gasped.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
