Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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