I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
