so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Randomize
