so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
