He asked to "fluff my boner.."
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
