TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
