So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize