I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
