she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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