do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
