i wish starbucks made bloody marys
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
