Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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