and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
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