Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
