Texts From Last Night

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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I want you more than these girls want KFC

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  (604): I want you more than these girls want KFC http://tfl.nu/a34i
  Replies (37) Good night (3635) Bad night (755) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.

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  (303): Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart. http://tfl.nu/j609
  Replies (8) Good night (1408) Bad night (4220) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.

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  (516): And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this. http://tfl.nu/g7ey
  Replies (9) Good night (3845) Bad night (877) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."

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  (630): And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs." http://tfl.nu/aazi
  Replies (7) Good night (903) Bad night (3562) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.

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  (404): Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore. http://tfl.nu/eu8g
  Replies (18) Good night (4586) Bad night (1749) Order T-Shirt
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

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  (660): We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out http://tfl.nu/p80s
  Replies (3) Good night (5163) Bad night (1008) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.

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  (904): Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up. http://tfl.nu/49qf
  Replies (5) Good night (4172) Bad night (890) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.

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  (610): The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom. (484): I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you. http://tfl.nu/hypz
  Replies (7) Good night (4442) Bad night (719)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life

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  (775): I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life http://tfl.nu/gkf7
  Replies (1) Good night (1404) Bad night (755) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself

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  (540): Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself http://tfl.nu/tr5c
  Replies (3) Good night (1148) Bad night (577) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I feel strange, like something is off with my body

  (1-604): View more from British Columbia

  Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days

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  (604): I feel strange, like something is off with my body (1-604): Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days http://tfl.nu/yx6p
  Replies (3) Good night (1457) Bad night (365) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?

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  (631): We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge? http://tfl.nu/xnes
  Replies (10) Good night (2023) Bad night (358) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.

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  (530): Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life. http://tfl.nu/z2vn
  Replies (6) Good night (1728) Bad night (447) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?

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  (770): So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night? http://tfl.nu/hytr
  Replies (3) Good night (381) Bad night (159)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.

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  (423): I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire. http://tfl.nu/h7s4
  Replies (2) Good night (317) Bad night (103) Order T-Shirt

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