Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
its not stalking. its research.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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