she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
