sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
