So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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