SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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