I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
