Texts From Last Night

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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.

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  (484): you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it. http://tfl.nu/od01
  Replies (3) Good night (1407) Bad night (756)
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  (805): View more from California

  i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.

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  (805): i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog. http://tfl.nu/tph4
  Replies (3) Good night (2357) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."

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  (901): I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..." http://tfl.nu/hs8y
  Replies (51) Good night (4710) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.

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  (631): But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures. http://tfl.nu/g3us
  Replies (12) Good night (1119) Bad night (2747)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!

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  (703): I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww! http://tfl.nu/rzts
  Replies (89) Good night (1017) Bad night (13985)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.

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  (224): Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night. http://tfl.nu/rq15
  Replies (9) Good night (3706) Bad night (1606)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  it's not cheating when I paid for it

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  (678): it's not cheating when I paid for it http://tfl.nu/o8mk
  Replies (67) Good night (1690) Bad night (5536)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.

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  (541): I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR. http://tfl.nu/y3sk
  Replies (48) Good night (3456) Bad night (925)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id

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  (519): I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id http://tfl.nu/33hp
  Replies (5) Good night (2708) Bad night (1345)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!

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  (814): My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween! http://tfl.nu/sc01
  Replies (14) Good night (2376) Bad night (705)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride

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  (320): she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride http://tfl.nu/iegm
  Replies (4) Good night (612) Bad night (1038)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.

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  (619): I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes. http://tfl.nu/rji6
  Replies (10) Good night (1572) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?

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  (336): Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex? http://tfl.nu/6zbe
  Replies (6) Good night (868) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.

  (775): View more from Nevada

  You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?

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  (303): A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car. (775): You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car? http://tfl.nu/g6l0
  Replies (4) Good night (936) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop

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  (484): I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop http://tfl.nu/re1e
  Replies (2) Good night (671) Bad night (253)

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