why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
