grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I think i peed on brittanys purse
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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