there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
