...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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