you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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