He is such a slut. More and more my type.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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