one might say we're banned from that church
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
My ass is underappreciated
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
