I showed him my bush... on skype.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
