I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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